Take Me Out to the Ballgame

And Take Me Home to Cry

Jesse had a work function at the Royals Game this Saturday.  We decided to take the whole family out for the tailgate, and then I would bring the kids home to go to bed, and Jesse would go into the game.

As we have probably mentioned before, getting everyone packed up to go to an event takes some planning.  And while we are at most events we are limited in what we can actually do, since usually one of us has to be holding Bella (she generally doesn’t like to be in her chair outside in the sun, and on a paved parking lot there really isn’t anyplace to lay her on the ground), and the other one is managing Oliver, since really outside on a parking lot, he still needs to be carried too.

Needless to say, it’s quite a chore trying to get everyone fed outside of the norm and for us to be able to enjoy ourselves a little.  I’m hoping it gets a little bit easier when Oliver can do more activities and have more fun.  But regardless we went and had a decent time.

Then on the way home in the vehicle the kids cried.  Oliver cried for half the way home and then went to sleep, and Bella started fussing as we got home.  Bella continued to fuss once she was put down on her blanket.

And I really couldn’t figure out a reason why she was crying.  So since Oliver had woken up and needed his bottle, I basically had to feed Oliver and ignore Bella.  Now Bella wasn’t doing a strong cry, more of a pouting fussy cry once in a while.  But after Oliver had his bottle and I put him down next to her, she went into a full on cry.

Any yes, Oliver thinks Bella’s crying is laughing, so it always makes him smile.

So then I had the dilemma of figuring out how I was going to put Oliver down to bed with Bella crying.  I ended up letting Oliver play a little bit, and tried to comfort Bella.  After holding her for a few minutes she seemed to be happy enough that I could put her back down and deal with Oliver.

Now here is the hard part.  For the past couple of weeks Oliver hasn’t wanted to go to bed.  I don’t mean he isn’t tired, I just mean he doesn’t want to put himself to sleep.  Nap times during the day are fine, but the evening hour, he is now insisting on being rocked to sleep.  And sometimes if you rock him to sleep and put him down in his crib, he wakes back up and wants the whole cycle to be done again.  I did this for about 3 days in a row and then said it was enough.  But Jesse and I differ on this point.  I am okay with letting him cry it out, and Jesse isn’t.  And this can be a tough one for people to deal with, especially when they are not on the same page.  With Oliver, if you pick him up and he immediately puts his head on your shoulder to go to sleep, then I’m guessing nothing is wrong, and he should be able to cry himself to sleep.  Then we also differ on how much time is the appropriate amount of time to let him cry.  I lean towards 20 minutes, Jesse says 10 should be the max.  So usually during his crying times we get frustrated with each other, and Jesse ends up going into his room to “rescue him”. 

And then of course that brings us back to tonight.  My question to Jesse and others who think we should just rock him to sleep and do whatever he wants so he doesn’t cry.  How am I supposed to do that when I am here by myself and have another child to deal with?  It would still be mean to leave Bella alone if she is in a good mood to put Oliver to sleep which could take 30 minutes to an hour, but what about tonight when Bella is screaming while I do our nighttime routine with Oliver.  I am very frustrated that we haven’t nipped this bedtime screaming yet.  There is no reason why a child who can put himself to sleep during the day, can’t do it at night. 

I have tonight to test the waters.  I put Oliver down at 7:15pm.  I went back to deal with Bella and Oliver screamed and screamed.  In fact for about 5 minutes they were screaming in unity.  I said I would go 20 minutes and then I would go back to him if needed.  But the thing is, it was only 15 minutes and the kid feel asleep.  So Jesse if you read this, it can be done, and it will be done.  Hopefully in a couple of nights it will all get better around here.

But that doesn’t mean I have any clue what is wrong with Bella.  She is currently laying beside me in our bed, since that seems to make her happy.  If only she could tell me…………….